numbers

who makes up the numbers that says what size we are?

I had wanted to talk about a brilliant article that Nigella Lawson wrote some weeks ago.But I never got around to it.

Then last week Fi Glover had written about,just that article in the Waitrose Weekend paper.

The reason I am bringing it up know is because of what happened to me this weekend.

Whilst out with my new friend Erin we happened to bump into one of my oldest best friends.She thought it was hysterical to comment on my weight ,which to her is excessive.She said she couldn’t believe I had left the house without my support knickers on and that she reminded me of something that had happened to her recently.She had bumped into an old friend who she hadn’t seen for years and she remarked God she’s got fat and let herself go.That must be what people say when they see you!!!!

Erin was horrified at what was said to me………and walked away

Well I have news for you old BFF.I don’t really care,just like Nigella.

I spent my childhood being severely underweight and being measured weighed and prodded on a monthly basis.

I spent my teens being teased for how skinny my legs were.

I had to see dieticians when I was pregnant because I was so thin.In fact at 18 weeks pregnant a consultant said I couldn’t possibly be pregnant a mistake had been made!

In my 20’s & 30’s I was envied for how skinny I was.

So what if in my 40’s I have put on a bit of weight.

Like Nigella who watched three family members die of cancer.She can’t see how the physical  fading away of the body can be associated with happiness.

She said in the article that her Mothers entire life was spent cooking for others.But never enjoying the food herself.She kept herself on a strict diet.That was until she knew she was dying and she ate with abandonment for the few weeks she had left.

I watched my father die,with his only wish being that he could eat sausage,egg and chips one more time.He hadn’t eaten a solid meal for months.

He was never a cook.But in his last few months he would spend hours buying,planning and cooking food.Only to be able to smell it and throw it all away.

I believe in our last moments we aren’t going to be worried about what people thought of our size ,whether we had finally got into that size 10 dress.I know my parents didn’t.They both died looking like skeletons.How glam is that?

So whilst it is hard not to take on board what friends say to you.Try and stick your ground and be true to yourself.

I’ll know when its time for me not to have extra helpings of cupcakes or 10 roast potatoes.No peer pressure from someone will.

Mind you this morning after I got dressed and Hubby remarked.Its amazing how much bigger you look with clothes on.You look so skinny without them.Back handed compliment if ever I heard one.

So if you see me walking around Tesco's naked with my old BFF don’t be surprised.

By the way can you tell which one is me in the above photo?I was much older than the others,one of them is my sister.

I’ll give you a clue.I still have the same bloody haircut and I was the only one who could never wear flip flops.I had delicate tootsies.