Wednesday, 3 November 2010

I apologise now

The digital layout I made today is of yet another unhappy memory.

For some reason Shimelles class is bringing up lots of unhappy memories, from things that have happened in my life.

Yesterday, I was unable to read or complete prompt 7. I was in too much pain to sit down and concentrate. So I had a rest from the computer and went to bed early. Today I have cancelled everything, topped myself up with painkillers and I am not getting dressed all day. I am sat here with huge, fuzzy hair waiting for it to dry naturally.

I always go with the first thought that springs to mind, when I read Shimelles prompt and I start writing notes and ideas of photos to use.

So this is what I came up with for prompt 7


Its is of course about my wedding day. What should be one of the happiest days of your life.  But mine was marred by my best friend at the time.

Let me give you some history. Fran was my best friend for years. She happened to be my husbands, ex girlfriend. He hooked us up, as I never went out and he wanted to have evenings out with his friends. So not long after we started going out as a couple he asked Fran if she would start taking me out with her. I think he lived to regret asking her this.We became firm friends and Fran was the sort of person who got noticed wherever we went. She was loud, pretty and everyone knew her.


We both had a passion for designer clothes and spent small fortunes on the latest's in thing. It often happened that we had or wanted the same item. But usually we had them in different colours and as we were very different shapes and sizes it was never really a problem.

But for my wedding reception in 1986 I spent £175 on a dress from the designer of the moment Azzedine Alaia.

Victoria Beckham and even Michelle Obama wear his clothes now and as you can see from this link to the shop I bought mine from, he is still going strong.

Fran at this time was working in the Kings Road,London .So after buying the dress, I stupidly took it to show her.

The next thing I knew she was on the phone, just before my wedding day, to say she had bought the very, same dress for my wedding. But not only the dress, but the jacket and shoes to go with it, all worth a small fortune.

I was so upset and felt my day was going to be ruined. I never confront people, so Chris rang her. He asked her not to wear the dress and how I felt, but she just replied she had spent so much and had nothing else to wear. There was no budging her, so Chris told her we didn’t want her at the wedding if she chose to wear the dress.

I heard nothing more from her. As I walked in the church I was excited, but my main concern was, had she and all her family come. I searched everyone's faces, but they weren't there. She chose her dress over me.

It spoilt my whole day and 6 seats on the main guest table remained empty for the whole reception. People would never have known on the day how upset I was, I hid it well. In fact when I had hypnotism years later he inadvertently took me back to my wedding day, thinking I could use it as a happy memory. He immediately realised his mistake when we got there !

So from then on we never really spoke again. Three months later our other friend got married. We spent the whole day sat next to each other and even danced together, but that was it.

Here I am in the said dress with a jacket over it. If you look behind me you can see Fran checking me out in the same dress and a white jacket. I just put on a big smile for the day so I didn't spoil it for our friend.

In this picture I am smiling for the camera with Fran sat right in front of me.

So yet again I was let down by a good friend. Is it any surprise I have become a bit of a loner over the years and wary of people. I trust no one.

You would think that would be the end of it. Fran moved to London and I only once bumped into her after that wedding day.

But oh no. She hooked up with some famous people and now runs a company organising celebrity parties. There was a time, some years ago when I couldn’t open Hello or OK magazines, without being confronted with pictures of her. She got her own radio show and a column in my favourite Sunday paper. So I couldn’t get away from her.

What could it have been that hubby liked about her.What is it we have in common. Maybe check out this link to see why.

I love the internet look what I found when I goggled her today . It wasn’t only Kate Moss spilling out of her dress.


Scrappi Sandi said... make me die! In every photo of you & 'her' right back to '86. you knock spots off her!! I know I'm biased, but truly you do...and the photo of her in that last link...well...if I ever look that rough you have my permission to put me out of my misery!! There is such a thing as class, which no amount of designer price tags can buy! I know which route I would prefer to have taken! That's a great LO...& again so impressed with you master of digi!! But as for the sentiment...let it go & just remember the happy bits!! See you tomorrow!

Jinnag said...

You know honey - you knock the spots off her every time! In the lat link she just looks like a tart well past her sell by date!! In your latest photos you look truly great. Stop beating yourself up!! You are amazing -believe it!! Just look at all you can do and have already done! Go back and re scrap that photo - based on Shim's"what if" prompt - and find all the good to say about your life now - KEEP THEM BOTH!Everything in life has 2 sides - and you should are the definite winner the way I see it.
Take care my dear!

Jinnag said...

Just thought - if Shim's class is letting those memories surface - then it is really good to get them out of your system - so let them go!

alexa said...

Sorry to read of your pain, and hope you will be able to work through it to somewhere happier.

kym said...

well what can I say !!!! that is one disgusting picture, you must have felt really good when you saw her looking like that, I bet you'd love to see her face to face now as you always look amazing, you'v got the last laugh, xxxx

Anonymous said...

I love reading your blog (and have been lurking for a while now) and today was no exception, except I felt sad for you (back on your wedding day). It also reminded me of a wedding I went to back in the 80's of a girl I went to college with. Her daytime dress was lovely. In the evening she went upstairs to change and came down in a white, Laura Ashley sailor style dress (think Romanoff girls 1918's). She was followed by her mother who had changed into a navy version of the dress!! Our mouths were open!! Sarah said she didnt mind, but she did and what was the mother thinking? People sometimes baffle me!

Stephanie Joanna said...

I won't lie - this story broke my heart a little. I can't imagine how I'd feel if my best friend chose a dress over our friendship. I'd be so shattered. Kudos to you for documenting this and being so honest. It couldn't have been an easy story to tell, but it's definitely worth telling. xo


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